The Simple Art Of Hosting

I had the most wonderful evening with an old friend last week.

Leaving my shady south-west London enclave for an hour's journey on a packed Victoria Line is not exactly top of my to do list in the current heatwave, but as well as being a dear friend, this girl is also an inconspicuously brilliant host.

Whilst I like to spend hours pondering menus, ironing napkins and hiking to the flower market before sunrise, I know that none of these are what it really takes to be a great host, and I envy her natural understanding of what actually does. Where I seek out the wow factor with scented candles, lowered lighting and layered linens, she effortlessly nails warm-hearted entertaining by offering wholesome and restorative food, in simple, thoughtful surroundings. 

As my friend breezily answered the door in floor length navy silk, with requisite whippet at her side exuding elegant composure, I was reassured my sticky journey had been worthwhile. Letting my basket slide down onto the blue and white tiles, and slipping off my dusty Supergas, I overheard from the kitchen the sound of glasses being gathered and a cork being pulled.

Over a hand-painted {sighs with envy} tumbler of chilled burgundy, sipped from deckchairs, I was reminded that hosting is rarely about formality or striving to impress. At its heart, it is about giving your visitor something that they need, and that you know they will enjoy. I needed to decompress from my journey; to cool down and settle in, and as I helped myself to english artichoke and cucumber batons, and sunk my feet into the cool grass, that is exactly what was offered.

Just as there is a time and a place for meticulously prepared food, considerately laid tables with the correct spoons, so too is there a place for a just fresh pot of tea and a plate of biscuits with a friend.

Sharing a cup of morning coffee on your porch {I mean not my porch, as you'd essentially be sitting on the pavement}, or cold glass of something to review your day, reminds us that to entertain is about the sharing of an experience in itself. I once read that at the end of a meal, rather than a carefully constructed pudding the author Roald Dahl used to bring out a cardboard box filled with classic British chocolate bars - Curly Wurlys, Wagon Wheels and Milky Bars...and I've always thought, what marvellous medicine! {Sorry}. 

Up in E17 I felt myself settling right in, and once the sun had set and the whippet had tired of her search for squirrels, it was time to haul ourselves out of the deckchairs for some restorative asparagus and pea soup, beneath the newly planted honeysuckle. By the time we'd mopped the last of the sourdough around our bowls, Love Island was starting {an absolute treat to watch in company, rather than my usual covert laptop catch-ups before my husband wakes up}.

 As Georgia reminded just how loyal she was, and the nation prayed for Girl Alex to choose Boy Alex, we moved onto the banana bread I had assiduously transported north with me, washed down with lashings of fresh mint tea - sorry, the Enid Blyton phrasing just felt apt.

My friend's natural, easy manner of 'having friends over' - taking the time to prepare a simple, seasonal dish on a hot summer's night, offering the most comfortable seat to watch the 'golden hour' sunset - and in my case sending me off with parcelled up seeds for my own garden, highlighted what it really means to host: To welcome someone in to your home and take the best possible care of them whilst they are with you.

Upon my recent marriage an elderly relative imparted some life advice to me - He told me that the secret to his own 50-year marriage was 'taking it in turns to care for one another'. Whilst this was shared with me in the romantic sense, I cannot help but feel we could all use this notion a little more in our daily lives.

We all have times when we need care and when we can read that need in other people. So when you are feeling good try to to offer up a plate of something to those who are, for whatever reason, not feeling so great. And when it comes around and you are not on top of your game, allow yourself to sit back and be looked after in return - ideally from the best seat in the house.

Your very good health xx